Humiliation Bonanza
Chapter 1: The Monster Is Coming Stacie walks to the office in the Poké Todaroture headquarters. She sees a lot of acquaintances in there. “Whoa, how did we get so many people in this room?” Stacie asked. “Behold, I’m the scariest, bloodiest, opponent ever!” Joshua Juritin said. “Um, Joshua, I hate to say this, I don’t know about that.” Stacie said. “What are you talking about? Nobody will like you!” Joshua said. “Pokémon Trainer Jade from South Carolina won a perfect battle against Giuseppe pretty easily! She wagered 3 billion Poké dollars and won the bet.” Stacie said. “You are the single biggest liar ever!” Joshua said. “I’m not lying! Her name is Jade! She is a n****, above 6 feet tall with green hair, wears an active wear hooded vest, a snapback hat, all of her clothes match perfectly together!” Stacie said. Joshua: “Active wear hooded vest? Oh please!” Joshua said. A buzzer blasts. “What the f*** is that?!” Oksana Velykazhinka asked. “Oksana, check the screen! Joshua, you might want to, too!” Marshall said. “Fine.” Joshua said. He does as Marshall said, as does Oksana. They watch a live video of a tall girl with a hooded vest, a matching shirt, a matching snapback hat, a matching shoulder bag, matching gloves, matching shorts, matching shoes, a mega ring, green hair, and dark skin, walk to the elevator. “Stacie is right! I see the hooded vest!” “I have never seen anyone draw a hood like this, I have to admit, it is so neat!” Oksana said. “Neater than your own works and dubs?” Joshua said. “Yes, but that is how I like it! F***ing so unsettling all the time!” Oksana said. “You know who is also unsettling?” Giuseppe asked. “Jade! That black girl in the hooded vest you saw in the d*** video! I had an Excadrill, she had a Beambomb. Beambomb is an Electric-type. Before I had a f***ing chance to attack the d*** Beambomb, Beambomb used Tidal Beam and knocked my Excadrill out.” “Jade is a Special Attack specialist! Make sure you have a lot of Pokémon with high special defense, maybe Lugia, Ho-Oh, or Regice!” Catalina Piaccasa said. “Jade? More like rage! More like hate!” Stacie shouted. “What did you just say?” Jade said after coming inside the office. Jennifer Burb and Orla Patterson are seated. They turn around, then see Jade, who has her arms crossed, and they start screaming uncontrollably and like crazy. The rest of their companions see where Jade is, and they start screaming uncontrollably and like crazy. Jade grabs a megaphone from the table with 10 megaphones. “SHUT THE F*** UP ALL OF YOU!!!” Jade shouted with a stern voice. Sophie can hear from an elevator. Soon, the elevator stops at the floor with the office. Suddenly, Sophie sees her genderbent counterpart, Samuel. “Samuel?” Sophie said. “What? Mind your own business!” Samuel said. Sophie gasps. Suddenly, another elevator stops moving, then it opens. It reveals a black couple dressed in green and black.” “Hi!” the woman with long green hair said. “Wait a minute. Are you Jade’s parents?” Sophie asked. “That’s right!” the man said. “I’m LaToya, this is Gym Leader Joe.” the woman said. “Hi, Joe and LaToya! I’m Sophie!” Sophie said. “I’m Samuel!” Samuel said. “Stay out of it!” Sophie shouted to Samuel. “Suck it up!” Samuel shouted. “Let’s go.” LaToya said. Joe, LaToya, Samuel, and Sophie come in the office. They see a lot of selfish parents and Jade in it. “Oh hi, Jade!” LaToya said to Jade. “Hi, Mom!” Jade said to LaToya. “Jade’s so tall she has to stand on a chair just to put on her hat!” Orla said to Jade. “What did you say to me, motherf***er?” Jade asked. (Orla is shocked) “Guess what, Orla? We don’t mind that!” LaToya said. “She’s right, you MERCENARY IDIOT!” Joe shouted. “Sophie is a four-eyes!” Orla said to Sophie. “Stop.” Sophie said. “Suck it up. Do 50 chin-ups on the bar.” Samuel said to Sophie. “Are you kidding me?” Sophie said. “No, he’s not kidding you, Sophie. Do it!” Oksana said. “You can’t tell me what to do! Stay out of it!” Sophie said. “Sophie, mind your own business, do the 50 chin-ups on the bar, and shut the f*** up!” Marshall said. “Do I see someone wearing Pokémon Trainer clothing? Hey, she looks cool as f***, I have to admit!” Angelo said. “The dark green giant?” Stacie said. “What did you call me?” Jade said to Sophie. “A dark green giant!” Stacie said. Jade gets furious and sends out a Poké Ball. “GO BOUNCER, USE PSYCHO CHASE ON STACIE!” Bouncer comes out of its Poké Ball and does so. Stacie Todaro moves upward. Stacie: “What the f***?” Bouncer moves Stacie out of the office. Stacie: “You can’t be serious!” Chapter 2: Samuel vs. Sophie “Alright, the battle between the two otters will now begin!” LaToya said. “ALRIGHT, ZE BATTLE BETWEEN ZE TWO OTTERS WILL NOW BEGIN!!!” Jamie shouted. “Go! Sophie Jr.!” Sophie said. A Buizel comes out of Sophie’s Poké ball. “Why is Sophie’s Pokémon wearing clothes? Whatever.” LaToya said. “Sophie Jr.? Really? Go! Friday!” Samuel said. "Friday? Seriously?" Oksana said. A Talonflame comes out of Samuel’s own Poké ball. “Sophie Jr., Aqua Jet now!” Sophie said. Sophie Jr. uses the Aqua Jet attack, knocking out the Talonflame in one hit. “Talonflame cannot battle! Buizel is the winner!” LaToya said. Sophie Jr., however, starts evolving. “Slash its evolution.” “NO WAY!” Jade said. “SOPHIE JR. IS EVOLVING!” Oksana said. Sophie Jr. has evolved into a Floatzel. “Yes! Sophie Jr. is now a Floatzel!” Sophie said. “Alright, Conker, go!” Samuel said, he throws the Poké ball with a Pachirisu. “Sophie Jr., return.” Sophie said, as Sophie Jr. returns to her Poké ball. “Bubbles, go!” Sophie said, she throws her Poké ball. “Conker, use Super Fang!” Samuel said. Conker does so, but the attack misses. “Alright! Start with Belly Drum, then use Aqua Tail!” Sophie said. Bubbles does so, then takes down Samuel’s Pachirisu in one hit with an extremely deadly Aqua Tail attack. “Pachirisu cannot battle! Marill is the winner!” LaToya said. Marill starts evolving. “Um, no.” Pietro said. "You idiot! Why didn't you use your Electric-type attacks?" Marshall said. “Sophie Jr. evolved, now Bubbles is evolving?! What the super, super, hyper, hyper, serious, serious, f***?!” Angelo said. Bubbles has finally evolved into Azumarill. “Oh yes!” Sophie said. “Bubbles is now an Azumarill!” Samuel’s face turns dark red. “Go! Killina!” Samuel said. “Bubbles, return!” Bubbles return to her Poké ball. “Go, Camo, use Sludge Wave!” Camo comes out of the Poké ball and uses the Sludge Wave attack. Killina gets knocked out. LaToya: “Serperior is unable to battle! Skrelp is the winner! Therefore, Sophie is the battle winner!” Skrelp starts evolving. “WHAT?!” Catalina shouted. “This is historic!” Joe said. “ARE YOU F***ING KIDDING ME?!” Oksana shouted. “This motherf***er is using cheat codes, this is some bogus bulls***!” Smoke Cigar said. Camo evolves into a Dragalge. “F*** you! You’re not a Water-type specialist anymore! What a grape you are!” Joshua said. “I’m an otter, not a grape.” Sophie said. “Yeah, a d*** otter, you’re not a human! Your strongest Pokémon is an otter! Why didn't you name that Sophie Jr.? Why would you choose to name that to your Floatzel instead?” Smoke asked. Joe gets a megaphone from the table. “ENOUGH!” Joe shouted. “Who wants to battle me?” “Against a Gym leader? Sure!” Joshua said. “Well, it isn’t an official gym battle! It’s a tag battle! Jade will be on my team!” Joe said. “Sounds good.” Jade said. “F*** you b******, and your entire bonanza of n****s!” Smoke said. “Motherf***er what did you just call my family?” Jade said. “Go Bouncer, use Psycho Chase to expel Smoke Cigar from the office ASAP!” Bouncer gets out of her Poké ball, uses Psycho Chase on Smoke Cigar, and takes Smoke Cigar out of the office. “WHAT THE SERIOUS F***?!” Orla said. “Orla, how the f*** did you get back here?” LaToya said. “It was pretty easy, n**** that needs to be mowed by a lawnmower just like Jade!” “Motherf***er what did you just call me and my mom? You called us the N word and made fun of us for our hair!” Jade said. “Bouncer, use Ice Block on Orla, then Psycho Chase on her!” “Oh yes, ma’am!” Bouncer said. She uses Ice Block on Orla. “B****es!” Giovanni said. “C****s!” Pietro said. “W****s!” Angelo said. “Do you want to suffer too?!” Jade and Bouncer said simultaneously to Giovanni, Pietro, and Angelo Todaro. “What? No!” Angelo said. “Then shut the f*** up!” Jade and Bouncer said simultaneously. Bouncer uses Psycho Chase on Orla, taking her out of the office. “Um, I’ll team up with you, Joshua!” Oksana said. Chapter 3: Tag-team embarassment “This tag battle between the team of my husband and gym leader Joe and his and my daughter Jade, challenging the team of Joshua Orbit chief executive officer Joshua Juritin and founder of Unstoppable Missy Floorz, Freak Foor, and XLockxBox Oksana Velykazhinka, shall now begin!” LaToya said. “Go! Delibird!” Oksana said. She sends out a Delibird. “Go! Glaceon!” Joshua said. He sends out a Glaceon. “This will be easy as apple pie!” Jade said. “Mega Firey, go!” Jade sends out a Torflamine. “Mega Firey? Wow, it actually does look like Firey.” Oksana said. “You ready for this? Go, Calaconda!” Joe said, he sends out a Poison/Steel-type evolved form of Seviper. “Calaconda? Are you insane?” Stacie said. “Glaceon!” Joshua said. “Delibird!” Oksana said. “Double Ice Beam!” Joshua and Oksana both said. “Mega Firey, use Flamethrower!” Jade said. “Calaconda, use Iron Bullet!” Joe said. Mega Firey uses Flamethrower, and Calaconda uses Iron Bullet. Delibird and Glaceon use Ice Beam, but they’re overthrown by Flamethrower and Iron Bullet, and they both get knocked out. “Are you out of your mind? Fire beats Ice all the time!” Jade said. “So does Steel!” Joe said. “Neither Glaceon nor Delibird can battle! Therefore, Jade and Joe get the easy tag battle win!” LaToya said. Chapter 4: Smoke and Orla are back “Hey, guys. What happened?” Orla said. “Joe’s Calaconda and Jade’s Torflamine managed to beat the s*** out of Joshua and Oksana in a Pokémon tag battle with little tiny effort.” Stacie said. “Joshua! Oksana! I can’t believe you weren’t able to damage Jade’s Torflamine or Joe’s Calaconda!” Smoke said. “Torflamine and Calaconda aren’t even Pokémon!” Orla said. “We’re not joking, they actually are.” Angelo said. “Yeah, I still can’t believe your performance was very bad.” Orla said. “Well why don’t you battle Joe and Jade and find out your own performance against them? Smoke can join your team!” Marshall said. “Sounds good.” Smoke said. “You will be so difficult!” Jade said sarcastically. “You’re right.” Smoke said. “Wait a minute? Isn’t that sarcasm? It probably won’t be an easy battle!” Stacie said. “I’m certain it will!” Joe said sarcastically. Stacie sighs. “They’re saying they aren’t.” “Yeah, right.” Orla said. Chapter 5: More Embarrassment To Arrive “This tag battle between the team of Leader Joe and Trainer Jade challenging the team of Orla Patterson and Smoke Cigar will now begin.” LaToya said. “Go! Dugtrio!” Orla said. “Rhyperior!” Smoke said. Smoke and Orla send out their Pokémon. “Let’s go, Beambomb!” Jade said. She sends out a Tecichno. “Mechatross, come on out!” Joe said. He sends out an evolved form of Skarmory. “An Electric-type and a Steel-type vs. two Ground-types.” Orla said. “We will actually probably win the battle against the red idiots!” Smoke said. Joe’s and Jade’s faces turn red. “Well, now I’m right.” Smoke said. “YOU WANT TO GET ATTACKED TOO?!?!” Joe and Jade said simultaneously. “Um, no.” Smoke said. “THEN SHUT UP!” Joe and Jade said simultaneously. “Beambomb, use Tidal Beam on Rhyperior!” Jade said. “Oh, goody.” Smoke said sarcastically. Rhyperior gets knocked out by Tecichno’s Tidal Beam. “Rhyperior cannot battle! Tecichno is the winner!” LaToya said. “Excellent job!” Jade said to Beambomb. “It was a motherf***ing trap!” Smoke said. “Dugtrio, use Mud Bomb on Mechatross!” Orla said. Dugtrio does so, but no use. “It’s a Flying-type, and therefore immune to Ground-type attacks, so it doesn’t matter if it’s a Steel-type! Mechatross, use Extreme Speed!” Joe said. Mechatross does so, violently knocking out Dugtrio. Mechatross' ability turns Normal-type moves into combinations of Steel/Flying-type moves and they do quadruple damage. “Son of a b****!” Orla said. “Dugtrio is unable to battle! Mechatross wins! Therefore, the tag battle will be won by Jade and Joe!” LaToya said. “You know what? I am determined to knock you out often. This is the most humiliating battle in history!” Smoke said. Chapter 6: Reicheru's turn to fight Reicheru comes to the office. "F*** that!" Smoke said. "That's right! You didn't see me coming, did you?" Reicheru said. "I did not! Guess what happened to Sophie's Pokémon?" Angelo said. "What?" Reicheru asked. "Three of her Pokémon evolved in the same battle against Samuel!" Angelo said. "No way!" Reicheru said. "Yes way!" LaToya said. "You must be Jade's mom." Reicheru said. "As a matter of fact, I am!" LaToya said. "Sophie, is it true that three of your Pokémon evolved?" Reicheru said. "Well, it is!" Sophie said. Sophie sends out Camo, Bubbles, and Sophie Jr., all of whom are now fully evolved. "Wow, you're not lying!" Reicheru said. "Why couldn't Sophie name her Samurott Sophie Jr.? The otter is Samurott, not Floatzel the f***er! Sophie is such a retarded piece of s***!" Joshua said. "HEY!" Sophie said. "Don't question it!" Joe said. "Are you Jade's dad?" Reicheru said. "Yes." Joe said. "Hay is for horses! Not people, not otters, horses!" Jennifer said. Joe grabs a megaphone. "3... 2... 1..." Oksana very quietly said. "SHUT THE F*** UP, YOU SINGLE BIGGEST BIG MOUTH!" Joe shouted. "Who wants to battle me?" "Oh! I'll do it!" Oksana said. "It will be a 2-on-2 each triple tag battle, with three trainers on each team! On my team, I want my daughter Jade and Reicheru!" Joe said. "Alright!" Reicheru said happily. "Now, who are you gonna select on your team, Oksana?" Joe asked. "I will choose... Giuseppe and Catalina!" Oksana said. "Sounds good." Joe said. The battle is quick to start. "This tag battle between the team my husband Joe, our daughter Jade, and Reicheru the Ghost Girl, challenging the team of Catalina Piaccasa, Oksana Velykazhinka, and Giuseppe Todaro, will now begin!" "You can battle us all you want!" Jade said. "Go, Lunatone!" Catalina said. "Beartic!" Giuseppe said. "Exploud!" Oksana said. Catalina, Giuseppe, and Oksana send out their Pokémon. "All right, Beambomb!" Jade said, she sends out the Pokémon. "Flames!" Reicheru said, she sends out a Reshiram?" "Flames? Calaconda, take the battleground!" Joe sends out the Calaconda. "Lunatone!" Catalina said. "Beartic!" Giuseppe said. "Exploud!" Oksana said. "Triple Ice Beam!" All three of them said at the same time. "Use Flamethrower!" Jade said. "Flames, use Fusion Flare!" Reicheru said. "Calaconda, use Iron Bullet!" Joe said. All six Pokémon use their attacks. The Pokémon from the antagonists all get knocked out. "Fire beats Ice everytime, weaklings!" Reicheru said. "That's right, all of you s*** c***s!" Jade said. "Steel also beats Ice, you spoiled brats!" Joe said. "Lunatone, Beartic, and Exploud are all unable to battle! The winners are Tecichno, Calaconda, and Reshiram!" LaToya said. "F*** you! Go, Krookodile!" Catalina said. "Hippowdon!" Giuseppe said. "Excadrill!" Oksana said. All three trainers send out their Pokémon. "Calaconda's in for a severe doom!" Catalina said. "Catalina, shut up! Calaconda, return! And your names sound alike? Whatever!" Joe said. Calaconda returns to its Poké ball. "Alright, Mechatross, go!" Joe sends out Mechatross. "Use Tidal Beam, Beambomb!" Jade said. "You said beam twice in a row, mo-" Catalina said. "You shut your mouth before I use it on you!" Jade said. Beambomb uses Tidal Beam on Excadrill, knocking it out. "Mechatross, use Extreme Speed!" Joe said. Mechatross uses Extreme Speed on Krookodile, knocking it out in one hit. "Krookodile and Excadrill are unable to battle! Mechatross and Tecichno are the winners!" LaToya said. "You know what? I am more than determined to knock somebody out!" Giuseppe said. "No, you're not! Flames, finish it off with Solar Beam!" Reicheru said. "Hippowdon, use Protect then Earthquake!" Giuseppe said. Hippowdon uses Protect. However, before Solar Beam hits, the protection fades. Before Hippowdon could use Earthquake, it gets knocked out in one hit with Solar Beam. "Hippowdon is unable to battle! Reshiram wins! Therefore, Joe, Jade, and Reicheru get the perfect triple tag battle win!" LaToya said. "YES! TAKE THAT, TWITSEPPE TWITARO! ARE YOU SURE THAT ISN'T YOUR F***ING NAME?!" Reicheru screeched. "Thanks a lot, Giuseppe!" Catalina said. "You should've use Earthquake first! That would've staved off sheer embarrassment!" Oksana said. "Well, you still would've been in a lot of jeopardy either way, you thunderc***s!" Joe said. "Okay, who's next?" Reicheru said, returning Flames to her PokeBall and getting a Rising Sun-patterned one out, that resembled an old Japanese flag. The ball opened, a white flash came out, it was an Espeon, Hinomaru. "Ah, lookie lookie, the idiots lost the battle." Hinomaru said with a smile. "Oh, god, not that thing!" Catalina said. Hinomaru was an expectionally a powerful Espeon, he transformed into his human form, shocking the antagonists. He wrapped his long tail around his waist. He resembled a cross between a Japanese WWII soldier and an Espeon, his dark purple eyes looked at the antagonists, He lifted up Giuseppe with his psychic powers. Category:Fanfics Category:Supernannya/Pokemon AU Fanfics Category:Fanfics by ThePlankton5165